18) <oerjan> In an alternate universe, ehird has taste
19) IN AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE: <oerjan> In an alternate universe, I would say "In an alternate universe, ehird has taste"
20) <ehird> so i can only conclude that it is flawed, or the world is utterly bonkers
21) IN EINEM ALTERNATIVEN UNIVERSUM (WO DIE NAZIS WON): <ehird> So kann ich nur schliessen, dass es falsch ist, oder die Welt ist vollig BONKERS. Gegrusset seist du der Fuhrer Hitler!
22) SUPLENTES EN UN UNIVERSO (MUSSOLINI CUANDO CONQUISTO EL MUNDO): <ehird> i tan solo puede concluir que es defectuoso, o el mundo esta absolutamente loco. Todos a la gloria Il Duce!
24) <Deewiant> ehird: There is no h in "honour"
26) <ehird> pikhq: A lunar nation is totally pointless.  <fungebob> ehird: consider low-gravity porn  <ehird> fungebob: OK. Now I'm convinced.
29) <ehird> is there a problem with it being carbonized :D  <augur> yes: carbonized coffee bean is known more commonly as "charcoal"
33) <ehird> `translatefromto hu en Hogy hogy hogy ami kemeny  <HackEgo> How hard is that
37) <ehird> With enough crappiness a display can show you invisible pink unicorns.
43) <oklopol> GregorR: are you talking about ehird's virginity or your soda beer?
44) <ehird> no Deewiant  <Deewiant> No?!  <Deewiant> I've been living a lie  <ehird> yep.  <Deewiant> Excuse me while I jump out of the window ->
60) <fungot> ehird: every set can be well-ordered. corollary: every set s has the same diagram used from famous program talisman with fnord windows to cascade, someone i would never capitalize " i"
64) <ehird> Gracenotes: No I said it does 54-bit
91) <fungot> alise: why internet is like wtf
95) <alise> like, just like I'd mark "Bob knob hobs deathly poop violation EXCREMENT unto;" as English  <ais523> alise: that's great filler  <alise> ais523: well it contains all the important words in the english language...
98) <fungot> alise: nobody is allowed to fnord me in soviet russia
102) <AnMaster> alise, marble  <AnMaster> marbelus
103) <alise> cmake is a nuclear powered waffle iron powered by a burning-hot testicle attachment  <alise> and it burns one of the waffles and doesn't touch the other.
104) <oerjan> alise: mainly it's the fact it blows so hard i cannot avoid hitting the walls of the thing, which completely goes against my basic public toilet hygiene principles
128) <alise> I love logic, especially the part where it makes no sense.
132) <fungot> alise: so parrot was based around gcc?
134) <alise> Phantom_Hoover: Don't be nasty; he's a lunatic, not a murderer.
136) <alise> "Europe is the national anthem of the Republic of Kosovo."  <cpressey> alise: I  <cpressey> I was going to say something then your last line floored me
137) <alise> Why do you use random acronyms you know we don't know the expansions of?  <pikhq> alise: TLAAW
139) <Vorpal> alise, it works fine for irc but interactive stuff? no.
141) <Phantom_Hoover> It's only been 2 months since anyone last made a commit!  <alise> WRONG 8 WEEKS
143) <Vorpal> ais523, what is "MS Publisher"?  <Phantom_Hoover> Vorpal, you don't want to know.  <ais523> Vorpal: be glad that you don't know the answer  <alise> Vorpal: "horrible"
144) <alise> i like to imagine their mangled limbs.
148) <fungot> elliott: i like scsh's mechanism best: it's most transparent and doesn't really serve a very useful feature.
151) <fungot> elliott: it's hard to debug havoc on your mirror if you accidentally hit r, then a character could be multiple words long, depending on the task.
160) <Gregor> elliott: My university has two Poultry Science buildings.  <Gregor> Two!
166) <elliott> Vorpal loves the sodomy.  <Vorpal> elliott, sure why not
167) <elliott> So it's not exactly trivial. [Later about same thing] <elliott> It's a trivial C program :P
172) <Vorpal> (had real world issues)  <Vorpal> (to deal with)  <ehird> Vorpal's pregnant.  <Vorpal> yes
173) <tswett> elliott: just to bring you up to speed, you are now my baby nephew.  <olsner> wtf, elliott is a nephew and his uncle is here?  <nooga> what  <tswett> Heck yes I'm elliott's uncle.
176) <elliott> quintopia: that's offensive, i was in a mirror accident and now my second half is a permanent mirror  <elliott> typing is kind of difficult
178) <elliott> oerjan: What, can girls aim their penises better?
183) <oerjan> elliott: i think i wrote a proof of 0*x = 0 on this channel once
187) <elliott> </pedant> ... come to think of it, <pedant>
190) <elliott> clue is a language for beauty, not usefulness  <elliott> or ability to run at all  <oklopol> ability to run at all is not even close to a design goal, no
196) <elliott> Getting bad programmers to like something is a failure.
198) <elliott> i thought you said it was meant to be more useful in practice :D  <ais523> elliott: well, it /is/, for sufficient values of useful in practice  <ais523> umm, sufficiently small
205) <elliott> mtve, now he's an expert idler.  <nddrylliog> mtve: kitty kitty kitty
206) <Vorpal> ooh I want to see ehird pole dancing  <ehird> I think that would be illegal.  <Vorpal> oh you are right  <Vorpal> damn :/
225) [on egojoust] <elliott> The fact is that EgoBot's % handling is O(slow) and O(big), and mine isn't.
231) <elliott> lol @ closed character set standard  <elliott> "What does this codepoint represent?" "Nobody knows."
237) <elliott> 320 quotes and still not a funny one yet!
239) <elliott> just because i'm homosexual  <elliott> doesn't mean i have sex with men.  <elliott> ...i'm also a paedophile [...] <elliott> see if i'm a gay paedophile  <elliott> i don't have sex with men  <elliott> i have sex with BOYS
240) <oklopol> actually the first joke i thought elliott was making was that he's so small masturbation is gay pedophilia
247) <fungot> elliott: there go my minutes of research!!
249) <fungot> Phantom_Hoover: if the list is in random order, like poor ehird here
250) <Phantom_Hoover> elliott, incidentally, I started my explorations again after getting bored of the Himalayas.
261) <elliott> ais523: quick, say something funny  <oklopol> something funny hagrea:D  <oklopol> can'tä sopt laughitn
262) <ais523> elliott: hey, thinking's easier than using the Internet
263) <ZOMGMODULES> elliott: parents who put just "Chris" on a birth certificate are... like parents who put just "Bob" on a birth certificate.
271) <zzo38> elliott: I doubt water memory can last for even one second in a gravitational field (or even outside of a gravitational field), but other people think they can make water memory with telephones.
272) <lament> elliott: well what i would do if i were omniscient and omnipotent would be to create an immortal woman with perfect tits and bang her for the rest of eternity
276) <Vorpal> elliott, it was an artful robbery!  <Vorpal> wait, murder
279) <elliott> A priori one cannot say that post hoc ergo propter hoc the diminishing returns would give; yet under quid pro quo one can agglutinate fabula and sujet into vagrancies untold.  <elliott> See? I'm intellectual.
290) <elliott> ais523: YOU WILL HAVE YOUR QUOTE SOON
298) <zzo38>    <elliott>    <quintopia> i know it's unusual, but i agree with you both to some extent
299) <elliott> Nationalism is no more (probably less) logical than consumerism, after all, as stupid as the word "logical" is as a system to rank things
301) <elliott> AV is better than first-past-the-post, like every voting system apart from the Random Elephant Stomping method
306) <elliott> Top universities now employ people to watch infomercials all day to find the latest mysteries.
313) <elliott> sgeo do you actually know what sex looks like i am just checking here  <Sgeo> I think so
314) <ZOMGMODULES> I can trust elliott_ to have an opinion on anything and everything  <elliott_> Yes.  <elliott_> And the best thing is: it is the correct opinion.
322) <elliott_> `addquote <olsner> two quotes about quotes about django  <olsner> I guess the worst part is that I appear in all three hackego quotes about django  <olsner> elliott_: another quote? you're not helping :/
324) <elliott> oerjan: but hypothetically, assume a Christian spontaneously materialised during the apocalypse
347) <oklofok> "<pikhq> elliott: Americans also have 20 mile one-way commutes." <<< one-way commutes? you have like disposable jobs?
348) <elliott> It's a Toy Story character, you uncultured fuck.
349) <elliott> HAHAHAHA NO FNARF QUOTES EVER  <Gregor> Oh noooooooooooooooooose!  <elliott> Gregor: lol nose geddit
351) <elliott_> I'm not even going to try and understand what you're proposing.  <oerjan> i understand it perfectly.  it's completely nuts.
355) <coppro> elliott: actually, it's worse right now, I'm in the USA  <coppro> where the solution to counterfeiting problems is "add more ink"  <coppro> eventually all US bills will just be solid green
358) <Sgeo_> "system is fairly sane  <Sgeo_> <elliott> imagine if the roomba was called the Robotic Magic Vacuum  <Sgeo_> <elliott> would you object to that being trademarked  <Sgeo_> <monqy> I mean  <Sgeo_> <monqy> phrase trade"  <Sgeo_> oops
363) <elliott> oerjan: can you delete that and the meta turing completeness page  <elliott> thanks  <oerjan> elliott: IN UNIVERSO ALTERNATIVO, OERJAN PAGINAS DELET
365) <elliott> im going to resurrect rutian  <elliott> with vitamin pills  <elliott> and book sales
368) <NihilistDandy> elliott: His mouse obeys the law of the excluded middle :/
372) <Phantom_Hoover> oerjan, little do you realise that everything you say and do is part of that great monad tutorial we call life.
378) <tswett> elliott: by the way, you're now almost capable of crawling.
386) <fungot> elliott: i have yet to demonstrate that the sml community has less productive power than the real chunk of meat.
387) <fizzie> elliott: You have become the very thing you fought for!
409) <elliott> God, I sure do hate Apple and their header files that only include the functions they're specified to.
410) <elliott> Do one better! Pretend to be an idiot until YOU DIE.
412) <elliott_> Vorpal: Won't be slower than Python ;-)  <Vorpal> elliott_, yeah but that is like saying a T-Ford going down a hill won't be slower than a bicycle uphill on a bumpy road :P
418) <elliott> in the title of the page it says "Well-Typed - The Haskell Consultants" but i want to know who are the haskell conraisins?
431) <zzo38> elliott_: No it isn't a game, it is a computer game
441) <fungot> elliott: an old colonel lost, but a new brother gained. together they will ascend, each time you must be adventurin'.
446) <Phantom_Hoover> You realise the micromanagement it took to make quintopia encrust my silver throne with emeralds rather than a jug?
457) <elliott> What does "life" actually mean, anyway; it seems to mean "this thing that's infinitely greater than all my actual hobbies that I do all the time because I rule"
464) <elliott> I MIGHT BECOME GHOST
470) <elliott_> I hope in the future people curse me for creating such a shitty protocol.
473) <Phantom_Hoover> I didn't realise nickel apparently can't be shaped into a screw because of some fundamental feature of dwarven physics.
474) <evincar> elliott_: I don't see a difference between a function taking a function as an argument, and some composition of those functions.
483) <Vorpal> elliott_, oh they are people known in the ruby community?  <elliott_> Vorpal: Uh... you mean Hannah Montana?  <Vorpal> elliott_, yeah. And Zed Shaw. Either they are that or they come from popular culture.
485) <fungot> elliott__: my fnord into normal life was a painful and difficult process. [...]
488) <elliott> we need more films aimed at the lucrative irc nerd demographic
491) <elliott> Deewiant: How do you go through life without seeing at least one gaping anus, that's what I want to know
492) <Sgeo> Maybe I should try to learn Scala instead of Ruby  <elliott> I will boil your veins.  <Sgeo> Which is less bad?  <elliott> Probably Scala, but I don't want you learning languages.
503) <Vorpal> elliott, it is typical of you  <elliott> Vorpal: so are most things I say
504) <fungot> elliott_: it's a machine that looks like you!
505) <elliott_> now that we've cleared that up let us hug fungot =  <fungot> elliott_: let's not start that again."
508) <elliott> help me i am so alone :(  <monqy> new computer good enough to simulate real parents
509) <fungot> elliott: ppl should vote clinton because obama is biracial every1 knows that dood, look at him he has been on something lately.
511) <fungot> elliott: mr president, commissioner, i fully accept that description when it comes to human rights. yes, with an average fat content of chocolate, and we are using double standards! we all know that under present legislation and also in relation to standardization bodies. if i do not want.
520) <elliott> When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a monad.
525) <elliott> Vorpal: who needs cars when you can walk to latvia
533) <elliott> Dear god stop staring at me.  <monqy> no never  <Phantom_Hoover> monqy is always staring at everyone.  <monqy> it takes many eyes to do this but I manage  <Phantom_Hoover> He is an inspiration to us all.
534) <elliott> Second Life is like... real life, modelled by people who've READ about real life, you know, in books.
538) <tswett> Come to think of it, I've praised you a little too effusively.  I'm not *that* pleased.  If you'll permit me to compensate slightly...  <tswett> elliott: fuck you.  <tswett> There.  Perfect.  Carry on.
551) <ais523> elliott: so what are the two issues with xfce?  <elliott> they're very unlikely to fuck up Xfce, and it can be made to work basically exactly like gnome two
573) <elliott> fizzie: It's like a JIT, if JITs were... strings.
574) (Of Minecraft:) <elliott> So basically I didn't understand what it was at all, I thought maybe you were meant to be like a worm and just sort of wriggle about underground.
577) <HackEgo> 678) <Ngevd> Dammit, Gregor, this is not the time to fall in love  <HackEgo> 187) <alise> Gregor: You should never have got her pregnant.  <Gregor> what whaaaaaaaaaaaat
578) <elliott> ais523: those suck  <elliott> hmm, those are all pretty good
599) <ais523> Vorpal: I was paying too much attention to elliott and not enough to my HP
600) <oerjan> elliott: it occurs to me that `? welcome is atypical:  its information is actually true.
601) <Vorpal> oh my god  <Vorpal> that is one ugly solution  <elliott> beautiful
605) <fungot> elliott: young john soon afterward receives as a visitor a fnord spaniard, fnord de moncada, who has escaped from fnord fnord dissolved in the absolute.
610) <Vorpal> elliott: well how will you represent "The dog jumped over the lazy dog" then?
611) <Phantom__Hoover> elliott, cars aren't perfectly spherical.
614) * Sgeo|web wants to see elliott be wrong about something  <elliott> Sgeo|web: That literally never happens.  <shachaf> Sgeo|web: There you go. A great example.
615) <elliott> ais523: You might want to downgrade to a sock to be safe
616) <elliott> ais523: I pronounce "xor" by punching myself in the face and then "or"
627) <fizzie> Do you want me to live dangerously and just stick it in the bot without testing it?  <elliott> fizzie: Yes.  <elliott> There is pretty much no way it won't be amazing.
639) <elliott> right: you didn't find out you were wrong, just right in a way we failed to consider.  <elliott> if only every wrong person could be so lucky
648) <elliott> monqy: it's only... ascii porn... the unicode bits stay covered
653) <elliott> I'm not biased towards humanity over sentient .txt files.
656) <Gregor> elliott: Back in my day, I didn't have to walk with a cane, but I couldn't shake it at kids on my lawn either!
682) <fungot> elliott: but, there are imps around, the pad. it's hard to remember though your cross-hairs would never settle on an innocent little girl. chokes up now imagine she's white.
684) <fungot> elliott: to be honest, it doesn't exist in a state of almost perpetual stalemate, and expands to a larger board and more exotic collection of what he refers to as a thermal hull, instead of some kind of clock pun. no, dammit, will this breakfast injure his shrill, bearded, scraggly old men in space. jade's radioactive, omnipotent, space-warping dog named...
687) <shachaf> elliott: Anyway, if you wrote a Haskell book, I would read it and possibly provide classical criticism.  <shachaf> That is to say, non-constructive.
691) <elliott> @more  <elliott> @more  <elliott> @more  <elliott> @more  <elliott> @more  <elliott> @more  <elliott> @more  <elliott> :(
696) <fizzie> fungot: Yeah, "fungott" would [...] remind people of elliott.  <fungot> fizzie: now that could be nice for a simple language can be used
701) <elliott> aaaaah my scherzo is unmeasurable
702) <fizzie> elliott: I'm not going to even bother with the recursive "I'm not going to dignify that" stuff. [...] <fizzie> *LAA LAA LAA NOT DIGNIFYING LAA LAA*
704) <fungot> elliott_: how usable is borges in the real world
706) <fungot> elliott: the new fnord  <fungot> elliott: what is the point? nothing changed.
714) <fungot> elliott: fibonacci heaps, trinomial heaps, fat heaps, thin heaps, fat heaps, thin heaps, fat heaps, relaxed heaps, and maybe even specifically optimized by the implementation
715) <elliott> then they edited their own talk page comments after someone replied to it, and edited /the replier's comment/ so that it made sense in context
721) <elliott> I CAN'T DEAL WITH THE PRESSURE OF EVERYBODY THINKING I'M CONAL
726) <shachaf> elliott: Apparently Rowan Williams is Primate of All England.  <shachaf> CHECKMATE CREATIONISTS
733) * elliott is back not for killing purposes but here to kill people.
737) <elliott> It's... not really links2-optimised.  <nortti> elliott: I don't think that any page is links2 optimised
738) <elliott_> (help why are german)  <monqy> i play the german version of crawl  <elliott_> i
741) <elliott> gah  <elliott> this language is of the devil  <elliott> oklopol: you're meant to use your powers for _good_
751) <ais523> coppro: I'm researching compiling high-level languages to hardware, which involves inventing new ones  <ais523> because there were no modern variants of algol specialised for hardware, oddly enough
763) <elliott> ha  <elliott> ha  <elliott> ha  <elliott> ha  <elliott> ha  <elliott> ha  <elliott> ha  <elliott> ha  <elliott> ha  <elliott> ha  <elliott> ha  <zzo38> Stop repeating yourself so much all at once
767) <elliott> I couldn't survive an apocalypse. I don't even have any bitcoins.
771) <elliott> oh, "legal" as in legal
778) <itidus21> elliott___: we have been calling a book new for 2000 years and it took einstein to figure out relativity
780) <elliott__> i just hit enter b/c its easier than ctrl+a del
798) <elliott> this sounds sort of like @ kmc  <kmc> well @ is the least upper bound of all ideas in computer science
816) <elliott> seriously q is the best fucking letter in the alphabet
832) <elliott> i wrote a better version once but it was broken
837) <elliott> I kept telling my therapist I wanted more conventional, non-hip-hop-oriented treatment, but it was no use. my shrinkwrapped.  <elliott> okay i hate myself for making a pun that bad  <elliott> please kill me  <elliott> :(
843) <Vorpal> elliott, mostly I want something that takes zero effort to maintain and update once the initial setup is done.  <elliott> okay well that is called not linux
845) <elliott> Deewiant: um???? You've forgotten axiom 1 of everything: everything sucks
847) <fungot> elliott: sorry, i don't know, some more booze and now, if you eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat! contains exactly the items!
859) <zzo38> Did you agree with what my idea was?  <elliott> absolutely  <monqy> what was your idea ?  <elliott> that was my next question
874) <elliott> Phantom_Hoover: I like how the Victorians hadn't quite figured out you were meant to name books something shorter than their contents.
877) <kmc> what is the linux equivalent of the magical purple light which makes things glow if they have been involved in a crime  <elliott> kmc: nmap??
896) <quintopia> is there a way to tag things on wikipedia as "wtf this makes no sense"?  <elliott> quintopia: {{featured article}}
899) <elliott> okay so  <elliott> i went to wikimapia per Bike  <elliott> and found a tiny little nowhere that looked like it might be it  <elliott> zoomed in  <elliott> thought aw yeah this looks remote maybe it's it  <elliott> turns out it's hawaii  <elliott> i am not very good at this 
918) <elliott> well what is time  <elliott> imo: an illusion [...] <Taneb> elliott, I think it's more like a burrito  <Taneb> If you have too much of time you get ill  <Taneb> But damn it felt good  <Taneb> You only get out what you put in, unless your time was made by someone else, which isn't as fun  <ais523> burritos don't work like that!  
924) <elliott> ~eval 1+2  <cuttlefish> Error (127):  <elliott> this is a great bot boily i love it
926) <augur> DIE  <augur> oh hey elliott
956) <Phantom_Hoover> Sgeo_, are you just trying to post kmcbait...  * Fiora imagines a cardboard box propped up by a stick with a pile of monads inside.  <elliott> Fiora: that is actually what Haskell is.
962) <elliott> also did you learn Haskell yet  <Bike> i think i've got most of it now what are these "type" things
963) <boily> it's raining in newcastle, therefore the elliotts are distinct.  <tswett> boily's Newcastle Theorem.
979) <Bike> elliott: atlas shrugged is basically about wacking galt repeatedly with a giant platonic solid
980) <elliott> it's such a shame the inventor of lisp was um  <elliott> ok i give up
984) <kmc> i'm not actually competent at hacking things  <elliott> ummmm kmc dont u mean `cracking' [tiny glider symbol with "hacker pride" written next to it in silkscreen] [head of a gnu] [tux penguin]  <kmc> [face shoved in toilet]
988) <elliott> prediction: kmc never comes back  * kmc has joined #esoteric
992) <elliott> Bike: oh huh. addition is really easy.
1011) <elliott> that is better than any made up story i was about to tell
1017) <Bike> ◊_______________________◊  <elliott> help.  <Phantom_Hoover> jesus christ elliott  <Phantom_Hoover> apply pressure evenly when jamming eyes open
1021) <elliott> sometimes i wake up and my name has grown more consonants
1022) <shachaf> i would visit elliott but i'm vegetarian
1028) <elliott> five fucks away from installing ubuntu
1037) <elliott> beautiful summer / massacres in qusayr / sent from my iphone
1041) <ais523> elliott: it's not so much that I've failed, just that I have not yet succeeded
1057) <kmc> 05:09 < utoneq> what exactly is a monad.. and where is the difference to a set or a tuple?  <elliott> kmc: the difference is that a monad is a triple  <elliott> one more element
1061) <elliott> you know, when people talk about emacs being an OS I doubt what they had in mind was that it needed a package manager
1065) <Bike> oh my, this is a photo of an elliott fisting [...] <Bike> i meant elephant  <Bike> but you know what, ok.  <kmc> Bike: ...  <kmc> Bike: can you send me that picture when i'm not at work ok  <kmc> plz and thx
1070) <@elliott> well, I think if you don't think figuring out who the opposite of shachaf is requires thought, then you don't know shachaf very well
1099) <elliott> my contract states right here that I have to tell you the best version of python is called haskell 2010
1106) <metasepia> `addquote \item <elliott\_> `addquote <olsner> two quotes about quotes about django <olsner> I guess the worst part is that I appear in all three hackego quotes about django \\ <olsner> elliott\_: another quote? you're not helping \texttt{:/} ← and three giraffes.
1129) <Taneb> kmc, I was trying to go to a sci-fi and fantasy society social, and I went to the wrong bar  <Taneb> Wound up at my university's fetish society  <Taneb> Didn't realise for an hour and a half
1160) <elliott> I would leave, it's just... I'd have to reorganise all my irssi windows.